The Fastest Fast Food - and plumbing

I almost forgot to tell you all about the plumbing disaster of the weekend. Okay. “Disaster” is a bit over-the-top.

I used the bathroom at about 6 AM one morning. In my bare feet, I couldn’t help but notice that the floor was not dry. Actually, it was not damp either. It was very wet. After some serious thought, I decided that I had not, indeed, had an accident earlier in the evening and therefore this was probably related to the plumbing. In the still of the night, I could hear a steady, but rapid drip, drip, drip... I awoke The Man Who Hates Plumbing. He muttered, went to the basement and shut off the water, and went back to bed, “till Ace opens”.

I cannot tell you what the problem was, actually, but it was hours and hours which The Man Had Not Planned To Spend This Way and several trips to Ace Hardware, interspersed with some colorful language, much bending and reaching behind the toilet bowl with a variety of tools (have you noticed how inaccessible toilets are?) and something about replacing something with a flexible something.

When The Man was done, I put a bowl under that valve thingy, just in case... This afternoon I noticed there is a small puddle in the bowl. What do you think? Should I tell him?

Then last night we had another fast food meal on Bluemound. Did you realize that some of the fast food joints are the cleanest places in town? Okay, not KFC. But McDonald’s! Yes, McDonald’s on Bluemound and Brookfield Road is immaculate. Floors scrubbed, bathroom positively shiny. Someone was scrubbing the napkin dispensers and the soda machine while we ate dinner there at 9:30 PM last night.

The Man’s food was just what he’s come to expect at this dependable establishment. A 740-calorie double quarter-pounder with cheese meal ($5.40). With large fries, of course. And diet soda (for the calorie conscious). When I eat food from McDonald’s (when traveling with The Man Who Doesn’t Waste Time Eating While On The Road), I usually order the Asian grilled chicken salad with Paul Newman’s Sesame Ginger dressing. It’s 390 calories, if you eat the whole packet of dressing, which you won’t. I know what to expect there too – mandarin oranges, almond slivers, greens, grilled chicken – good stuff. But someone, some friend who’s name I can’t recall, but when I do, will no longer be my friend, recommended that I try her favorite menu item at McDonald’s - the Southwest chicken salad ($4.40). I decided to expand my horizons. I ordered it. With Newman’s Southwest dressing and a cup of decaf ($.50).

What is wrong with my memory retention? (Do not answer that.) Why can’t I recall that within the last couple of weeks I have complained (that’s the polite word for it) of the spicy salsa at a Mexican restaurant, and have wondered what I was thinking when I ordered something that said it was “Cajun?” A Southwest salad dressing? What was I thinking? I scraped the dressing off as well as I could and ate the grilled chicken.

My brain failure is not the fault of the restaurant. Actually, through the smoke emitting from my nose and ears, I still was able to detect McDonald’s nice, dark woodwork and the classy, navy, plaid wallpaper. This McDonald’s is a nice place for a quick, cheap meal (our total was $10.83).

Avoid regrets. Have the Asian Grilled Chicken Salad.

Kitchenless in Brookfield